A quiet New Year's without blogging. Time spent otherwise. With friends, some lovely family visiting, some unfortunate family drama, but also happily cooking, screening, celebrating, reading, then blissfully immersed in The Wire season 4. I found myself not writing because I realized very few were reading, and I wanted that post about
helping to linger. I pretty much never make resolutions but do have a feeling about change in 2008. I do have a sense to shift some priorities. There's a health imperative pushing but it's also just seems the proper changes in their proper time. I'm 50 now. Married 25 years (in May.) My youngest is graduating from high school. There are economic realities to face. Things. Stuff. Another shift in what's already been a life full of realignments. Which is fine. It's how it should be. Though I'm not a practicing Buddhist, it's what they all say. Life is about change.
It can just be hard to take that different step forward. I look back, and even in this short term, see some changes of direction and priorities. But they've happened without thinking. So now I have to consciously set the stage for another change. And I have to figure out how to consciously set in motion the unconscious propulsion. That's the trick.
Making an effort to read again, consciously pushing away from this keyboard, I browse in and out of books gathered along the way. I find myself delighted by this 2nd Chakra mantra recommended by Caroline Myss:
I am filled with the vital energies of life and I take action with confidence and power.
So I repeat it. Goofy perhaps. Images of Stuart Smalley from the old SNL but what the hell. It can't hurt. And I've already experienced the difference it makes to feel and say thanks rather than something more negative. So why not? One foot forward.
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