My salsa pals place 3rd in World Salsa Open in Puerto Rico

How unbelievably excited I am for my salsa pals (and teachers) Azucena & Carlos and their Jazzy Dance Company!! They remain a true inspiration - and it's been a glorious treat for me to become involved in their world first as a student, then strategic media advisor, and now friend.

Jazzy Dance Co places 3rd at the World Salsa Open in Puerto Rico

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Jazzy Dance Company wins 3rd place at the Puerto Rico World Salsa Open in the team division.
Out of 8 teams from different countries that qualified for the finals, Jazzy was the only one from the USA. We are happy to have represented Texas and the USA at this World renown Salsa Open!
Stay tuned for videos of all competition routines...


Dear Friends and Salseros of Austin,

I am beyond excited to share with you this past weekend's events. After 9 days of beach and sunny days, we arrived yesterday from San Juan with tired bodies but a very happy spirit ! As a dance team, we hadn't really considered competing in the World Salsa Open in Puerto Rico. But destiny had something else in store for us.

At the beginning of June, we got invited by Jayson Molina to compete in the team division after he had seen our Zip zap routine on video. And in spite of the fact that we hadn't really planned to make that expensive trip, we decide purely on faith that it'd be worth a try.

(full story)

Great New Instructional Salsa DVD from Everyone Can Salsa

I'm so proud of Azucena and Carlos! My kick ass incredible salsa instructors just created their first instructional DVD in the series: Everyone Can Salsa. And it's fantastic! Check it out here!

Jazzy Dance Co zip zap routine at GoDance Apr 12

Before sxsw came calling, I was spending a fair amount of my time thinking about this:



I'd gone from quietly taking classes with Azucena and Carlos to spending more and more time with them strategizing on how to help them reach a larger audience. Which they deserve because they're amazing! Amazing dancers, amazing competitors, amazing teachers. They're unbelievably competent in so many areas covering a wide range of skills, and they're lovely people to boot. It's been thoroughly inspiring to become part of their creative background team. I hated missing the company's grand debut performance at the On Your Feet benefit in Austin on Thursday night. I hear it rocked the house! The video above is from the warm up performance at the GoDance Studio salsa social on April 12.

On Your Feet benefit with Azucena and Carlos Apr 17

I'm really looking forward to this benefit, headlined by Grupo Fantasma and featuring my very excellent salsa teachers Azucena & Carlos, their Jazzy Dance Company, and a slew of other music and dancers from around the world. I've already got my tickets!

On Your Feet" International Music & Dance Extravaganza
Date: April 17th, 2008 Doors open at 7:00PM
Location: Monarch Event Center (at Lincoln Shopping Center across from Highland Mall)
Tickets: $15 in Advance & $20 at the door

Very satisfying Saturday salsa

Back from the continuing Saturday On2 Salsa workshop. Man that challenges me! In a good way. But it's hard. And incredibly fun. It feel likes burning new grooves in my brain. I've read about that the very slightest bit - how the brain has certain patterns and when you learn something new, you create a new pattern. For those old enough to remember, the visual is a record, the needle riding the grooves.

When I'm in this class, I can feel the burning happening. It has to do with timing. (um, and coordination of the timing with my body and all the isolated parts there within!) It's this funny balance of learning something new and different, and learning it enough so that it makes sense. I'm a terrible athlete, with almost no eye and hand coordination (which I've noticed is a real liability particularly when I driving -particularly making left hand turns. I can't tell how much time I have...hmmm. although i guess that's not exactly eye hand coordination but more like speed/depth perception. Oh well, I digress.)

But I've always had good rhythm. I hear music rhythmically. So at first it's like, ok, no big deal, I'm just feeling the music here, but then there's a new move that challenges my fundamental timing. It's from the music of course still, but in a different way I haven't moved before. Sometimes I literally feel like my head will explode. I can't even think about it consciously. But I just remain, and repeat, over and over again. The verbal counts somehow making a dent in my brain patterning until it's there. It's impossible til all of a sudden I'm doing it. And not only am I doing it, it feels just right, and it's really, really fun.

I made a joke months ago about calling salsa dance my zen practice. It's come to be not a joke at all. The attempt, the showing up, the being open to the effort, the proceeding without judgement shutting me down, it's an amazing practice and it's been enormously fruitful. And did I say fun? It's unleashed a joy that I hadn't realized was dormant. I'm making the minimal effort, attending one or maybe two classes (90-120 minutes each) a week right now, (rather than daily with the extra 4-5 times a week out in the clubs like many of my "peers") but it's ok. It's still spilling over. The joy remains and spreads.

Ahhhh salsa again

It'd been months. My favorite teacher left town, then I got really busy. And stayed busy. September, October, November, now December rolling by without making it to the studio that had been my regular haunt for over a year. No Sunday nights at Dallas. Missing it for legitimate conflicts but also knowing I'd hit a crossroad. Good enough to be a little impatient in the classroom, not good enough to really hold my own in the world. (And don't even get me started on the foot pain.)

Luckily, a couple of weeks ago an On2 beginner's workshop came round that fit into my schedule. I'd been waiting - it's a different beat count, one that the better dancers seem to enjoy. I'd meant to step up and check it out last winter, but another student's "It's hard!" deterred me. I'd missed the summer series because I thought we were going to Fiji. Then watched those in that series zoom ahead. So I was thrilled when this one came around. Five Saturdays 10:30-noon. Great to be back in class, and surprise! My favorite teacher back around to lead it. Salsa moves to an 8 count like this: 123,567 - emphasis on the 1 and 5, a hold on the 4 and 8. With On2, it's 123,567. Emphasis on the 2 and the 6. Right away, On2 felt way more natural. It's how I hear the music. It's actually what I thought I was looking for in the first place. Funny now to realize that part of my lagging and losing the beat was because while on1 I was hearing on2. So excited. But still perplexed - 90 minutes a week isn't nearly enough. Should I go back to the regular on1 classes? Will I get too confused? My film and family life conflicting while I'm even just thinking about it.

But tonight was the monthly salsa social night. John and I were having a mellow time at home. I finally finished The Abstinence Teacher (which I LOVED!!!!!), and spent some time catching up on Friday Night Lights. I start musing aloud, "Should I go?" "It's so hard to go there. I haven't been in months. Will I even know anyone? Will anyone dance with me?" John says, "You should go." I answer, "Do you have any idea how hard it is for me to walk into that place?" He laughs, "I can't believe you do it at all. You should go! You always have fun."

So I did. It's only $5 and 10 minutes away. Not too many people there but I run into one of my favorites immediately. Then another. Then still another who shows up a little later. These are nice guys who love to dance, who I've been in classes with a long time, guys whose leads are getting better and better. Nice guys who are happy to give me a turn. It's a mellow and empty enough that I dance consistently. And I'm thrilled. Because it's the simplest most wonderful kind of fun. Exhilarating and hard and just joyous. And there's been something about the persistence. I'm not exactly the most dogged individual or disciplined. But this is something that's taken time and commitment and overcoming fear (however petty) and embarrassment and self consciousness. It's challenged me on so many levels so simply, so wonderfully. I've hung in. I've progressed. It's great to be back in the saddle again.

Mad Hot and Soulja Boy Crank

I spent the morning watching Mad Hot Ballroom. What a great movie! Somehow I'd missed it when it came out, hoopla and all. I figured I'd love it - couldn't miss with kids, dancing, and NYC but still, just never got around to it. Watched it this morning on Showtime On Demand - and what a great time! And of course all the more because of my own experience with ballroom dancing these days. Yes, that's exactly the merengue we do. So moving to see these kids take to it so beautifully. So important to consider what this means in their lives. And it reminds me that arts in the schools is not just a PC liberal platform extravagance. It's essential that kids are exposed to the broad spectrum. You never know which chord will be struck to help others feel the best, feel really alive, feel inspired and motivated. (And oh too, the NYC in the film? What a great overview of the city itself, and what it means to be a kid growing up there. They did a fantastic job so economically.)

To continue the theme, John sent me this link -for this Soulja Boy Crank That song/music video/instructional dance video that totally cracked me up. Doesn't it look like fun! Reminds me of every single morning in 6th grade, lined up at the door, when a bunch of us would leap up and do the Tighten Up before the bell rang. Talk about a good time.

Dancing Downside

Damn. Maybe I've discovered the downside to my salsa fun (along with aching feet), I've come down with the worst cold. And it must be from the kickass farewell social for Azucena on Saturday night, or the three hours of classes on Monday. That's a lot of hand to hand contact and sweat. Saturday night the sweat was pouring off us, something we girls all laughed about and shared as we moved off the floor.

Here's just a taste of Azucena and Carlos fooling around. Really crappy video, sorry. You can't tell, but it's the end of the night, near 2am. The crowds had left except for a hardcore few, mostly we were crowded around watching them dance. We'll really miss her but wish her the best!

What got me started learning salsa

The other day someone asked me how, why, I'd even started with the salsa lessons. And it's funny because on the one hand, I'm not exactly sure. I don't really know what got me to drive up and walk in the door for that first free lesson last August 1st. But there were at least two antecedents.

Back in November 2005, our friend Donny Ward, who was so instrumental in the whole Fiji adventure from the gitgo, and has been a good and important friend for years, mentioned a young friend was passing through Austin and would we make time to meet her. Of course we did. We met at Rubys for bbq. She brought along a friend, and didn't linger, because they were going out dancing. Salsa. "Hmm, salsa, " I said, "I've always loved the music and have been thinking it'd be great to learn how to dance to it." Rachel said she could point me where to go. And did in a follow up email. She sent several ideas, singling out Azucena and Carlos at Go Dance. I read the article she'd written on Azucena, and left it at that.

Summer 2006, a producer friend gave John a rough cut of A Place to Dance by local filmmaker Alan Berg. He watched, but it wasn't really his thing. Some weeks later I decided to check it out. And I loved it! I was totally moved by it. It's a doc about one of the last surviving Big Band Dance Clubs in the South, in New Orleans, where people in their 70s, 80s, even 90s, doll up every Sunday, and get on the dance floor. They were fantastic. Totally digging the dance. Staying active, staying alive because of this simple pleasure. I found it so inspiring, I'm pretty sure that's why got me to check out the dance studio. It's like a decision I made 10 years ago about yoga. I'd imagined myself as a 60 year old practicing regularly. If I was going to be practicing at 60, didn't I need to get started? Same thing with dance. And why wait? Isn't dancing one of the great pleasures anytime?

And maybe there was one more inspiration. I think as I was talking one day about getting close to 50 and wondering about the future, wondering what mattered most for me ahead, a friend said, "What were you most interested in when you were 12?" There's no question that dancing was everything to me then.

Salsa Saturday and Sunday and Monday

It's almost a year now since I started taking salsa lessons at the studio here in Austin. I could never have imagined what it would feel like, and how I would be a year later. I probably would have expected more, quicker, but as it is, there's been steady progress. I've come a long way, I've way, way further to go. But it's been in increments that I can't even really delineate. For months I couldn't spin, and now I can. There are still others much better than me, and plenty worse. I navigate through the classes trying to keep up with the guys who are pushing me, and instructing the others that are getting their feet wet. It's great. Still challenging. Still totally invigorating. And pushing it up to the next level. Some Sunday nights now I head out after 10pm to the local club where others from my studio gather. It takes all my energy to walk in the door. But once there, it's tremendous fun to dance with the familiars. These strangers are strangers still, but we're connected with a kind of kindness and shared interest. In the off moments I steel myself from the humiliation, "Ugh no one to dance with. Why are they all dancing with her? (even though I know the answer to that one...). It's OK to sit and watch. It's OK."

Saturday I went to a two hour workshop in the middle of the day. A room full of women, almost all younger, almost all thinner. And we worked on styling. Owning the look of the dance. Using our shoulders, and arms, fingers extended, body rolls and hips moving. It's hard! It's hard not to feel like an idiot. At the same time, if you don't make the effort, you don't look great. The challenge is to ride out that middle period - before you look good, still working on it. I tell my daughter later, "you could think me ridiculous for trying in this room full of younger women, or you could think, 'this is great my mom is working on this.'" "I think it's great," she responds.

Later in the evening, after The Simpsons Movie with John, I head out again for the monthly salsa social. Each moment these days more precious as the most talented teacher is leaving soon for NYC. I haven't been since December or January. As always, I worry whether I'll have partners. But it's fine. I do. I dance so much the back of my neck and hair are completely wet. It's fun! There are two guys I dance with who know my level, and are sheer joy. With the others, I struggle up and down. The better guys are looking for something I don't exactly know how to follow. The newer, just trying to keep the beat and manage some simple moves. I'm happy to help them through. Back leading when necessary or just following to help them gain confidence. Once and awhile there's a shared glance and respectful distance. I know the guys see me, I try to emote that it's OK they're not asking me to dance. Other times I just stand and watch - digging the more talented. Both trying to learn and just enjoying the show. The star teacher and her partner insanely fabulous. When I head out @ 12:45 I feel invigorated and good. Proud I put myself out there and enjoyed myself.

Sunday I feel warmed up as the regular class starts. Monday, more exhilaration kicks in with Salsa 3, then 2 back to back. I'm trying to soak it all in before this special teacher moves on. Of course yes, there are other talented teachers at the studio but Azucena is amazing, both in her performance and teaching. I'm kicking myself that I wasn't ready earlier to add the On2 classes on Wednesday nights or sign up for the boot camp. I wish I could have pushed up earlier. But it just didn't work out. I had Monday night conflicts, as well as a natural learning curve.

But it's all cool here almost a year later. I'm so glad I started. I'm so glad I stuck with it. I'm excited to continue.

salsa 3

What a difference a day makes. Yesterday slogging my way through Sunday salsa. Patiently re-learning a sequence learned months ago, calming the newer guys, and feeling totally like a dork. Knowing that if any of you saw me there, you'd be horrified. How can she be doing this? Group lessons in a mall. Patiently moving around and around in a circle, changing partners, learning a few steps at a time. But that's part of it. Talking to Adriana last Sunday - part of this whole experience is allowing myself to feel like a dork, to actually be a dork. Besides the challenge, and the just plain fun, that's part of the gain. As A. confirmed, "If you never allow yourself to be uncool, you miss out on a lot."

But tonight! Tonight was so much fun that it wiped away the slog. Started in on West Coast Swing 2 - not unlike salsa but slower and danced to R&B. On a 6 or 8 count, it's like second nature. It's smooth and fun. Lots of different new guys in the mix but men, and men enjoying the dance. Then a step up into Salsa 3. Not as exciting as it sounds - frankly, I'd wondered where my favorite better dancers had gone. Some have moved on to the exclusive team or boot camp, but some had just graduated themselves up. The instructor said I could try, "But how are your turns?" Um....ah..... But it was fine. Great even. The guys nod and smile. The teacher gives me a surprise compliment, "Wow, you've improved." Pretty great. I'd missed Mondays for months. Sacrificed for the totally awesome master class and other assorted fun, but now it's great to be back. Salsa 3, then Salsa 2 - still challenging and cool with this great teacher. By slogging week after week after week, somehow the moves have gotten easier, the patterns making sense. It's coming together. It couldn't be more fun. And it's possible I look like a dork. I'm certainly big and middle-aged. But I'm not letting that stop me. I'm allowing the good time, I'm reveling in it.

zen salsa

I'm still going to salsa classes though real life film and fun events have interfered with my steady schedule. So I go when I can, each class harder than the last to walk into. You'd think that'd be the opposite since I've been going since August. For awhile some months ago maybe it was getting easier - I was in the flow, getting better, feeling really good about the immersion. Then John's Monday master class knocked out that preferred class, with conflicts on the good Thursdays and least interesting Sundays as well. Now it's the same syndrome: what should I wear? (How to downplay my natural zaftig voluptuous shape, stay covered, yet not too hot?) Will anyone dance with me during the warm-up? Often that's a no, except for guys I don't want to dance with either. For some it's a height thing, for others age. I'm sure weight's a factor too. I'm come to understand how most of the guys are trolling for the young hot girls. Of course. It takes everything I have not to bolt with humiliation. The class begins. If there are more women I'm miserable with the downtime. If the guys present happen not to be able to dance, even worse. It can be tortuous following a terrible lead. But then I fight through the resistance. I remember, damn it, this is exercise, and a challenge, and it's just for me. I'm not here to meet anyone. I have love in my life among other great pleasures. This is just a practice that suits me. And isn't practice all about sticking out the ups and downs? I calm the flee response. I try. I determine to continue though it's getting harder and harder.

musing about friends and dancing again

I was thinking earlier today, as I've thought before so many times, that if I had even a twinge of a scientific mind, I'd study the laws of attraction. I'm endlessly fascinated by why we like the people we do. In any group, at any age, there are people you find yourself more interested in and less. Why? It's not like everyone has the same response. We have different connections and they're exciting. Of course a truism...but still it fascinates.

I think about this all the time anyway, but my salsa classes bring up a particular intensity. Because it's a different way of knowing people. For me anyway. It's not at first an intellectual connection, or professional, or even friend of a friend. It's more pure somehow (and therefore shallow? Hmmm, not sure.) It's based on looks, how people move, how they learn to move, and how they choose to interact in an abstract, limited moment, again and again and again. The teachers laugh about how cliques form during every cycle. How can they not, with repeated greetings, week after week, all through the year. Sure there are some people everyone likes, like the adorable new blonde who looks amazing, can really dance, and seems to be sweet besides. But other than that, it's a crap shoot. I feel particular ease with C. and L. and F. although I don't prefer to dance with F, I just prefer talking to him. The other two got my attention from the dance. And with D. I feel an immediate connection though I rarely see him. There's rapport with others of different variations. E is great looking but odd to dance with. I like the way T. dances but we dance together badly. I move around this circle, week after week, learning more, getting more comfortable, trying harder, working it out with the same group of faces that changes slightly from night to night but overall is the same, and I muse at the relationships forming or not.

poetic justice

There is some poetic justice in the world. At least where I go, the best looking guys are NOT the best dancers. Which is great.

What a delightful weekend

A delightful weekend though I have to confess, I hate the question, "And how was your weekend?" Most of my life isn't delineated into weeks and weekends. And even when it was, weekends were more often dreaded than enjoyed. But this weekend was a surprising amount of fun. Just finished watching the Colts/Patriots game with my two football nuts. I think they were amused and surprised by my questions and engagement. Certainly fun for me to tap into their male bonding.

Last night I took some deep breaths, and conquered my little fears, to attend my studio's monthly salsa social. I knew it was time to take the dancing up a notch. And I was hoping that I was a regular enough that I'd find some dancing partners. But it was still a gamble. I didn't know who else would show, and really didn't know if they would choose to dance with me. In a class, it's easy - everyone dances with everyone else. In a social it's free choice. I don't remember being much of a wallflower in 7th grade but the fear still exists. So I tried not to arrive too early. Then I stopped by a nearby Starbucks when the parking lot seemed too empty. Finally I went in. There were only a few people there -and all couples. I took some more deep breaths. Chatted up the studio teachers running the show. A stranger asked me to dance and was both patiently teaching me and criticizing. Ugh. I watched some fantastic pairs doing the real thing, chatted them up, and appreciated their words of encouragement and inspiration. Eventually one of my favorite partners showed and we started to dance. A lot. Simply. Cracking each other up, easy with each other as we tried to figure out what to do. It was great to feel that comfortable. I stayed for hours - enjoying some terrific dances along with some misfires. But the vibe was fun and supportive and I'm exhilarated and thrilled I traveled outside my comfort zone to go.

Friday night, John and I met our daughter to check out The Hitcher - in what we thought might be her first onscreen movie credit. She wanted to see how her work turned out. Not my normal movie fare -- too gory and terrifying. But the leads were cute and everything actually looked great. Lovely to be there with our production gal. As John and I cracked up enjoying the coming attractions (particularly for Hot Fuzz, which looks hilarious) our daughter said, "See you're the only people I can see movies with because you laugh out loud. No one else does that."

working on the mind as the salsa continues

Two and a half hours later, still feeling joyful from tonight's salsa class. Monday nights are the most challenging, and the most fun. Challenging because of the teacher. Fun because all the advanced students participate because of the teacher. I cannot stress just how much damned fun it is to dance with a guy that can dance. You don't have to think, don't have to try, you just move. It's like flying.

Mulling, daydreaming, I realize the key is not to be embarrassed. It's a waste of time to think, "I'm fat, I'm not good enough. I can't do this." Doesn't serve anyone. The key is to relish it, to commit. And you can't commit if you're holding back, if you're insecure. You have to feel fabulous. At least I think that's right :) I think that's what I'll try. I know it's right.

listening to music with different ears

It's funny the way we all listen to music differently. I mean how we literally hear it differently. I listen for the rhythm, beat, quality of the voice, and harmonies. Words come much later, if they come at all. I have to be way engaged first by the rhythm and overall sound for the words to penetrate. The sound burns a groove, then the meaning.

I don't know why. I can't describe in musical terms the beat I'm looking for - but I always recognize it. In the many recent articles on James Brown, they keep refering to the genius of "stressing the first and third beats rather than the second and fourth." I don't really understand what that means, but of course I recognize the examples cited as my favorites. The NYT wrote, “I changed from the upbeat to the downbeat,” Mr. Brown said in 1990. “Simple as that, really.” I'm not a musician, never studied music theory - I really don't know if it is that simple or not. I've just always loved the sound. In the old days, guys checking out my record collection used to say, "hmmm, James Brown? Rare for a girl to be into.."

The listening divide can be confusing when it comes up with friends. Yesterday on KUT-FM I heard a song that immediately grabbed my attention, "Complete or Completing" by The Annuals. Grabbed my attention so completely I dropped what I was doing and looked for it on Napster where I could hear it again in its entirety. (Not a download, or illegal download of old - that's what they offer now - a limited number of full streams.) Repeated it 4 times.

I checked to see if my good friend Matt had mentioned it in his Albums Worth Your Dime. He listens to tons of music and is a great source. Duh, it was right up top, on a blog entry I'd read an hour earlier. He'd mentioned it as one of his year's top 25. But he compared it to Arcade Fire - a critical darling group I could never get into at all. So now I'm totally confused. I go to Amazon.com to hear some samples (why not itunes? who knows - I check out different sources, different moments.) Click on the first track and no - I don't think they sound alike at all! Not one bit! The singer and the beat are profoundly different. So what is Matt hearing that's so different than me? This has happened before. He recently compared Sufjan Stevens' concert at the Paramount to "Imagine ELO fronted by James Taylor." I can't imagine what he's talking about except maybe that ELO and Sufjan both use violins. I can't put my finger on it, but I know I'm not hearing ELO with James Taylor's vocals. If I did, I wouldn't love Sufjan Stevens so much. Not to rag on Matt here :) I think we're really hearing the music differently.

In my salsa classes I don't have to count. That is, for the most part. I hear the beat. But I dance with partners who clearly don't, though they try. And when it comes to samba (the sound of Brazil), I hear it so much more clearly than anyone else. Which is odd. Why? I'm far from the best dancer in the room but it just makes perfect sense to me. Everyone else struggles. How am I hearing it differently? I'm not just talking about a preference - I love XTC, you don't. I'm talking about the very way the music makes itself known to us. Just really wondering about it.

Holiday Showcase with my new friend

Last night I went to a Holiday Showcase for my dance studio. Dress was "semi-formal," with a cash bar and hors d'oeuvres at a nice South Austin hotel. Walking in, it felt like a High School Reunion. The dress was fancier than I expected. Hell, I should have known better, this is Texas! My clothing range varies little - different shades and textures of simple black touched off by a varying intensity of makeup and earrings. That's it. But this crowd was quite swank and good looking.

I went with my new friend from class. The one who'd caught me on Sxsw Presents and then googled me. Which I found to be way more charming than creepy. It's a very familiar new-friend pattern for me. She's one of the cutest girls at the studio. I'd noticed her dancing before I recognized her at Sunday yoga. I mentioned the yoga, she mentioned the TV, and now she's the one I talk to. I watch all the guys hit on her, and ask her to dance while I'm standing by, and it feels very familiar. Only now, not only am I not single and available too, I haven't been in decades. But the syndrome feels the same. I don't know how she feels about being single. She asks more questions than she answers. But she's lovely, and we have a good time when we talk. I kept feeling like I should shoo her off to one of the cute young guys there, but she seemed comfortable hanging with me. One of these days I'll get her story.

I was primarily interested in the showcase to see the teachers. They did not disappoint. Real dancers, real beautiful lines and grace. But what was the surprise was the students. More women than men, of varying ages. Of varying ability too, but joined in their desire to perform publicly. Which means to be seen. Early on, my friend A. leaned over and asked, "Think you'd like to do that?" The answer was emphatically "No." I really don't like to be looked at. Why? I don't know. I performed as a child into early teen years, then stopped. I really don't like to be looked at, at all. To be known, yes. To get credit, absolutely! But to be looked at, definitely not. It feels like a different breed entirely, those who crave the spotlight. I recognize it, I truly can't relate.

salsa continues

A month later I'm still dancing. Now up to 3 times a week, two one-hour classes each trip. Salsa 2, samba, cha cha 2, and cha cha shines. I'm totally engaged. Still not that good, but good enough to be intrigued and motivated. I go because it makes some sense. It's exhilarating. It makes me laugh. But also because it's a challenge. Some things are a challenge with no payoff. I spent eight years of my childhood skiing and hated every second of it. I spent much of my high school years sailing and gardening. Neither took. Dancing is just the right amount of challenge for me, like with yoga and pilates. I have to work but the payoff is both immediate and rewarding over time. These disciplines remind me of how differently our brains function. Some things I get so quickly. Movement isn't one of them. I have to concentrate. I need a lot of repetition. But once I get it, a whole new world opens up. This is still outside my comfort zone but I'm enjoying it so much I keep going. Mondays, Thursdays, Saturdays. It cuts into my movie going time. But it's the priority for this moment. This feels like what I need to be doing. It feels like a wake up call.

I'm clearly a regular now. I see the same faces week after week. We smile in recognition and pleasure. Still barely know names from our name tags, and definitely don't know anything else. The conversation remains solely on the moves and helping each other get better. The better dancers inspire me. I really don't know how long it'll take for me to look good. I get the steps, I keep good time. I need more time to get the attitude and style.

It's just fun

Oh forget about all the fussing and mental agonizing in regards to my salsa classes. Now that I'm in level 2, it's just so much damned fun! Not intellectual in the slightest. I couldn't care less about the social dynamics. It's not about what anyone thinks of me, or how much they like me. It's about how much I'm loving the dance. It's exhilarating and a total kick. Guys who can really dance. Guys who are there to dance. Real movement as we woosh around the room. It's a major endorphin high for me.

There's nothing like a great mind with brilliant articulation and original thought. I love that. I love conversation passionately. But there's nothing like leaving it behind too. Letting go into pure motion, the music leading. Adjusting to a stranger, matching the rhythm. The high of non-verbal communication. Giving into their lead, having it take you to just right the place. I'm just sorry it took me this long to get going. I'm having a great time.